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Sometimes I wonder why waste time and energy with people not listen to me either.
Let me explain, often people who call us or write to us do not know anything .. not even use that program! And you also get angry when they realize that not enough to say "should not be the system" to allow us to solve the problem.

Some time ago I received the following call for example by a utonto that in addition to not even know what his name was also quite stubborn ...


... the phone rings ...


Me: HelpDesk are

Utonto Nick: Hello, I'm Paolo Rossi (real name NDR) , I can not log ...

Me: Get where?

Utonto: Well, I'm just stuck ...

Me: Ok, but stuck where?

Utonto: Like where?

Me: You said that you could not enter, but go where??

Utonto: Eh ... in computer ...

Me: In Windows? On the home screen? You have just turned on the pc?

Utonto: No I am already inside the PC, not within the system ...

Me: What?

Utonto: The system ...

Me: What system??

Utonto: What?

Me: That type of system / program you have to go??

Utonto: Eh ... I do not know ..

Me: I guess you clicked somewhere ... where you clicked??

Utonto: On TinyTerm ....

Me: Ok, then open TinyTerm and on what system you try to log in?

Utonto: TinyTerm! Tel'ho said!

Me: TinyTerm is an emulation program, which connects to a Unix server ... you which server you connect to?

Utonto: Ah do not know ...

Me: It is written in the address bar at the top of TinyTerm

Utonto: Here it does not say anything!

I (I surrender) : Tell me the IP of the computer ...

Utonto: XXXX

I (once connected) : The system is PINCOPALLO ... See? It says here.

Utonto: Ah ....

Me: Ok now try again, I have already restored the account

Utonto: Perfect work.

Me: A place Hello ...



all'utonto Now that I've explained how to understand what it's called the program to work on for years now, I can take it for granted that the next time he calls will all be much easier and faster for both ... something like: Hello, I'm disabled on PINCOPALLO - Ok, rehabilitated - hello Thanks!


Instead .... the next day calls for the same problem ... beak and I always ...


Me: HelpDesk are

Utonto Nick: Hello, I'm Paolo Rossi, I can not get into the system

I (I recognized him but I pretend to nothing) : What?

Utonto: Eh ... boh ....

Me: How boh ... on which system you need to connect?

Utonto: Ummmm ... the TinyTerm ....

I (give him a little help) : Ok, but where you need to connect with TinyTerm? Perhaps the PINCOPALLO??

Utonto: Ummmm ... No no just TinyTerm!


At this point I give up and I linked to his computer to re-explain where it should read ...
There would be understood, no? Exact
not got a bat!! The next day, still calls and wants to jinx it Ribecco always me!


Me: HelpDesk are

Utonto Nick: Hello, I'm Paolo Rossi, I can not get into the system

Me: What?

Utonto: Eh ..... boh .... TinyTerm ...

I (finally giving up) : Ok rehabilitated ...

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The utonti will never cease to amaze me, oh my ... now I am not surprised about anything, but despite that I developed the habit every day to have to do with the tuna I still have moments of doubt ... A
Some time ago I received a phone call from un'utonta who apparently mistook for a PC sofficino ... or to stick a fish


... the phone rings ...

Me: HelpDesk are

Utonta Nick: Hello, I can no longer turn on my laptop

I: The battery is charged?

Utonta: Yes, but does not go even with the power ...

I: But not just signs of life?

Utonta: Mah. begins to load then you hear a noise like something that you scratch off.

Me: Ok, you open a ticket to repair the PC.

Utonta: But how can you be so broken??

Me: I do not know ... happens ....

Utonta: But until yesterday afternoon was!!

Me: Now it's broken ... happen ... electronic components'm not eternal ...

Utonta: But it may have happened because of me?

I (thinking "but how do I know rocket ?!?!?) : Ah ... I do not know you use the pc ....

Utonta: Maaaaaaa ........

Me: Yes?

Utonta: Can you hit something that has remained all night in the trunk of the car?

Me: No, unless it has not rained in ...

Utonta: No it did not rain ... but where I live last night the temperature dropped below to -15 degrees ....

Me: Ah ....

Utonta: You say you can hit something?

Me: Well ... have virtually put the computer in the freezer! We believe that no longer works ....

Utonta: Ah so that's what ...

Me: Yeah ....

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THE TWO OF OLEGGIO ... NEVER OPEN THE TICKET


.... One is stupid and the other is worse. Would you say a friend of mine.
Once I got a call (not from Oleggio, but oh well) from two utonti who apparently thought that the printers were to settle on their own.


... the phone rings ....

Me: HelpDesk are

Utonta Nick: Hello, here we have a problem with the printer.

Me: What's the problem?

Utonta: What does not go ...

Me: What?

Utonta: Do not print ..

Me: Which program dies?

Utonta: Eh boh ... I know! I

: Printing from AS400? Unix?? from Windows??

Utonta: Eh boh us mold the documento_strano_mai sentito_in_vita_mia

Me: Tell me the IP of your computer that I connect, so I can see straight ...

Utonta: XXXX


I connect to the pc and I had to do some simple printing from Windows ... but the job went wrong already being spooled before being sent to printer. Then do some testing etc. restarting the spooler. but to no avail. When utonta says something incredibly useful ...


Utonta: quard But the problem is not mine alone. Others will not even print.

Me: Eh? But this is a local printer connected to your PC. It is neither in the network share.

Utonta: But I guess that's the network ...

Me: Here it is installed on the USB port. But what this printer is physically connected? On your PC or in a turret on the wall?

Utonta: Eh ... boh colleague who you step on it understand ...

I (I guess ironically) : In the place !!!!!

Utonto: Hello?

Me: Yes, I was asking to c. ... (But I stop immediately)

Utonto: We connected the 03 to 15

Me: Eh?

Utonto: We connected the 03 to 15

Me: What?

Utonto: We connected the 03 to 15

Me: In what sense??

Utonto: We connected the 03 to 15

Me: Ok but what is the 03 and what is 15??

Utonto: Eh ... the printer! We connected to the 15! (do not know why they call it the "03" and do not want to know NDR)

Me: And I guess 15 is the number of the tower wall ... right?

Utonto: Right.

Me: But you did an operational request to put the printer on the network?

Utonto: No, I do not know what it is ...

Me: Let me see, you've got a local printer, you've made an ethernet cable and have connected to the first tower free and tried to print??

Utonto: Exactly.

Me: So it's obvious that does not work ... to put a printer on the network to activate the turret, because if you've never used is not likely to be active, associate an IP address to the printer and install it on each computer that will be used ...

Utonto: Ah ....

Me: And to do everything you need to tell your manager to fill out the application form and send it to the relevant office ...

Utonto: Oh ok then I will do so ....

Me: Here ....